(From wire reports) – Already facing a relentless onslaught from presumptive Republican nominee John McCain, Mitt Romney was forced to endure yet another indignity in his unraveling Presidential bid as his five sons held a stunning press conference Tuesday afternoon to formally endorse the Arizona Senator for President of the United States.
Romney has poured a considerable amount of his personal fortune into what is increasingly regarded among the punditocracy as a quixotic quest to nab the GOP nomination. Romney’s sons, Tagg, Matt, Josh, Ben, and Craig, were unabashed in their support for Senator McCain and hoped this would send a clear message to their father to offer a long-overdue concession and withdraw from the race, and save what little is left of their inheritance.
“For the love of Christ, Dad, stop the insanity”, said Romney’s eldest son, Tagg. “The five of us have 13 mortgages and 11 boat payments between us. You’ve had no problem accepting Jen’s and my hospitality at our house in Aspen every year. If you really want to visit us at a time share next winter, make another goddamned ad buy in Pennsylvania, and watch McCain clean your clock there, too.”
“You really want Ben to take a fucking job as a mid-level Wal-Mart Vice President and send your grandchildren to University of Delaware just so you can stroke your own ego like it’s your teenage dick?”
The Romney sons refused to take questions from reporters, as Tagg Romney had the last word in the press conference. “We’re voting for McCain. Period. If you still don’t think we’re serious, pay for another town hall meeting in Ohio, and try and savor that memory of the last time your grandkids came to visit, because the next time you see them will be looking down from heaven when we’re all shoveling dirt on your casket.”
Governor Romney could not be reached for comment.
